Disney To Start Ejecting Unhappy And Upset Guests From Parks
New Disney patented technology has lead to a new policy to keep up the "Happiest Place On Earth" vibe by ejecting unhappy guests.
Edit: This was our 2018 April Fool's article.
Disney has developed new technology–which it patented some years ago–to detect a guest's mood when they walk past hidden sensors around the Walt Disney World theme parks. It was originally thought Disney would use this technology to find patterns at park locations where people were not happy (whatever that average gauge woud be), so they could improve on the services or attractions in that area.
Turns out, Disney have a more abrupt approach to this technology.
Disney have long been advertised as the "happiest place on Earth". And what takes away that feeling the most? Other guests being upset or unhappy. Disney has been ramping up its security staff force over the last few months, and this seems to be why.
If one of the sensors picks up a guest being unhappy or upset more than 3 times in a park day, they will be escorted out of the parks and asked to return to their resorts. Unfortunately, it is in your theme park ticket terms and conditions they have every right to do this. This is to make sure all the guests in the park are happy make sure everyone is contributing to the happy environment.
I would advise people to try and pretend to be happy (I mean, how can you not be in Disney World?) And if you have any upset children, take them to a near restroom to try to calm them down as much as possible.